Friday, February 19, 2010

Party Crasher

Hi, my name is Adam.

TRAVIS: Can I help you?

I've decided that I'm not putting up with it anymore.

ME: Is this where John Davis and his friends are staying?
TRAVIS: Uh, yes, it is.
ME: Great.

I pushed through the random guy at the door and walked into the living room.

JOEY: Adam?
CARTER: What are you doing here?
JEREMY: Run!

That was when I noticed that all the CBQ's were sitting either on or around the couch with two guys pointing guns at them.

ME: You know what, I don't want to be anywhere I'm not wanted.
TRAVIS: Oh, but we want you here.

He shoved me onto the couch in between Joey and Carter.

ME: Awwwwwkward.

Random guy, who I would later learn was named Travis, then proceeded to pace back and forth like one of those bad guys in the movies.

TRAVIS: Now what am I going to do with you boys?
JACKSON: I say kill Davis and call it a day.
DAVIS: You bitch!
HANK: I second that--sorry, Davis.
TRAVIS: The trouble is, you've all seen me and my friends here. So at the very least, I'm going to have to cut out all your tongues.
CARTER: But I do some of my favorite stuff with my tongue!

I raised my hand.

TRAVIS: I'm sorry--do you have a question?
ME: No, this is just the signal.
TRAVIS: What signal?
ME: The signal to Paige.
JEREMY: Paige?
ME: She's outside the window with my uncle.

That was when four armed men busted down the front door.

ME: My Italian uncle.

Before Travis' men could do anything, one of my uncle's friends came flying through the window, and cracked both their windpipes.

Travis reached for the gun in his pocket, but Davis tackled him, and he went down pretty hard.

BILLY: Adam, what--
ME: I figured you guys would need help once Travis found you.

Paige came running into the house.

PAIGE: That was sooo cool! Way better than when we did it in the practice run.
BEN: There was a PRACTICE run?
ME: My uncle is very thorough.

Jeremy gave me a hug.

JEREMY: Adam, that was amazing.
ME: Does this mean I'm one of the gang?

Everybody looked at each other. Then Davis cleared his throat.

DAVIS: Adam, welcome to the CBQ's.

They're lucky. If he hadn't said that, I was going to turn Uncle Vito on them.

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