What Money Can Buy

Hi, my name is Davis.

TRAVIS: Someone owes me a 'Thank you.'
ME: Did you finally get rid of that tie with the penguins?

I had just gotten out of the shower, and Travis was sitting in bed with a robe on looking pretty pleased with himself.

TRAVIS: Even better. I took care of that Skyler character.

Skyler had stolen money from me after kidnapping my best friend and wreaking havoc all over the place.

So of course, my first response was a smile.

But then--

ME: When you say 'took care of...'
TRAVIS: Let's just say the next time someone rakes the Mississippi River, they may find that the fish are extra fat this year.

I felt every drop of water on my body evaporate in that moment.

ME: Travis, what are you saying?
TRAVIS: I better not get into specifics. You never know when you may have to testify.
ME: You're kidding, right?
TRAVIS: Well, you were going to do it anyway. Now I just took the burden off you.
ME: I wasn't going to--do what you did--which I don't know you did because I don't want to know, but needless to say I wasn't going to do that!

Oh God, I'm sounding like Jeremy now. Is this what relationships with crazy rich men do to you?

Travis stood up and put his hands firmly on my shoulders.

TRAVIS: John, nobody takes advantage of the people I love. If they do, they pay for it. It's as simple as that.
ME: I only wanted my money back or I wanted him in jail. That was all.
TRAVIS: But you don't need money anymore. You have me.

Gulp.

TRAVIS: Now come hop in the shower with me.
ME: I already took a shower.
TRAVIS: Then you'll take another one. Let's go.

Some people may like that whole 'order me around' thing, but I'm not one of them.

Hitman or no hitman, Travis was on his way out.