The Producer

Hi, my name is Jeremy.

ME: I have a proposition.
RITCHIE: Jeremy, you have a boyfriend now.
ME: Not THAT kind of a proposition.
RITCHIE: Oh, sorry. Carry on.

I had gathered all of the boys together at the Cheesecake Factory to talk to them about my idea.

ME: Over the summer, I've been thinking a lot about producing a show.
CARTER: By yourself?
ME: Well, help would be appreciated. That's why I've asked you all here.
HANK: I thought we were going to talk about our feelings?
CARTER: I feel confused.
HANK: Fascinating stuff, Carter.

Billy raised his hand.

ME: Yes, cutie?
DAVIS: Gag me.
RITCHIE: Buy my dinner first.
ME: Billy has the coconut...pie...slice.
BILLY: Thanks. I was wondering what show you want to do?
JACKSON: Judging by how he's been acting lately, probably Billy the Musical.
CARTER: Billy Elliot?
ME: I want to do Angels in America.

There was a silence.

DAVIS: Isn't that a little...
RITCHIE: Insane?
DAVIS: I was going to say 'ambitious,' but 'insane' has a nice ring to it.

I knew this was coming.

ME: I can do a stripped down production. Very minimal.
HANK: You mean cheap?
ME: I mean artistic.
ALL: Cheap.
ME: So none of you are going to support me.
BILLY: I'll support you, babe.
ME: Thank you.
BILLY: I get to play Prior, right?

And another theatrical adventure begins...