Taylor Returns

Hi, my name is Ben.

TAYLOR: Pack your bags. You're coming with me.

Perhaps you don't remember Taylor...

--FLASHBACK--

JEREMY: Good morning, Ben.
ME: Um, I did something stupid.
JEREMY: Stupid like 'got a tattoo that says "I <3 Muscle Men"' stupid or stupid like--
ME: I slept with Taylor last night.
JEREMY: Oh, that kind of stupid.

Taylor was the first guy I had ever done stuff with, but we'd called it quits after I met Victor, the boy currently going to school in New York.

Try to keep all these gays straight if you can, folks.

JEREMY: How did you ever wind up at Taylor's?
ME: I needed to borrow sheet music from him.
JEREMY: Okay.
ME: Because I have that audition next week.

I was trying to get into the same school as Victor so that our blooming love could continue to...um...bloom.

ME: And Taylor offered to play out my part for me. That was at eight.
JEREMY: Uh huh.
ME: I just left there five minutes ago.
JEREMY: So instead of just playing your audition, he played the whole Ring Cycle for you?
ME: Victor is going to kill me.
JEREMY: Tell me about it. Not five minutes out of the closet and you're already a cheater.
ME: Don't call me that!
JEREMY: This is why I told you committing to someone when you're still dealing with your sexuality was a bad idea.
ME: I am not going to be one of those trashy gay guys who sleeps around and has one-night stands all the time!
JEREMY: So what did you tell Taylor?
ME: That this was just a one-night stand.
JEREMY: Excellent.

-- End of FLASHBACK --

Taylor ended up moving to California to pursue his graduate degree, and we hadn't spoken since that night. He tried calling me a few times, but I never responded.

Then Ritchie found out he was back in town, and invited him to stop me from putting the kibosh on Jeremy and Skyler's love affair.

Now here we were, at my place, in bed--some things never change.

ME: I'm not going back to California with you.
TAYLOR: But we obviously still have feelings for each other.
ME: Yes, I often feel like I want to rip your clothes off when I'm around you, but that's not a good thing.
TAYLOR: Ben, didn't being with me bring back any--
ME: Bad memories? Lots.
TAYLOR: You don't mean that.
ME: Look, you're leaving.
TAYLOR: And you're coming with me.
ME: Absolutely not.
TAYLOR: What are you staying here for? Ritchie says nobody likes you. You're living with your ex-boyfriend. You hate school. Why not just come with me? Even if we don't work, California might.

I'll admit--he makes a good point.

Knock, Knock.

ME: Shit.

I opened my door. Nathan was standing there looking all dressed up.

NATHAN: You forgot.
ME: Forgot what?
NATHAN: The party.
ME: Party?
NATHAN: Hank's birthday party?
ME: Oh shit!
NATHAN: I can see how it slipped your mind, what with the fornicating and all--

I started throwing my clothes on and throwing Taylor's clothes at him.

ME: Nathan, how much time do we have until everyone gets here?

Knock, Knock.

NATHAN: Not much.

Kill me.

TAYLOR: What's the big deal?
ME: I don't want Jeremy seeing me with you. He'll flip. He's convinced you're the reason I turned into an asshole.
NATHAN: Ohhh, so this is the guy who should be paying for my therapy.
TAYLOR: Look, I'll talk to Jeremy.

I needed to get him out of there.

Knock, Knock.

NATHAN: I have to get the door.
ME: No! I mean, yes! Go ahead.

Nathan left.

ME: Taylor, I'll make you a deal. You go out the fire escape, and I'll...I'll...I'll meet you wherever you want.
TAYLOR: And come back to California with me?
ME: I'll think about it.
TAYLOR: Fine. While you're thinking, I'll have a chat with Jeremy.
ME: YES! I'll go! Just leave for now!
TAYLOR: The Bickfords on Jefferson Boulevard. We'll go to the airport from there. Pack light. We can have everything else shipped out to us.
ME: GREAT! GO!

Taylor threw on his jeans and hopped out the window just as Jeremy appeared in my doorway.

JEREMY: Are you ready to go?
ME: You bet.
JEREMY: Did you start wearing Taylor's cologne?
ME: Huh?
JEREMY: It smells like the cologne he used to wear.
ME: You remember his cologne?
JEREMY: Who wouldn't? He used to drench himself in it.

He turned to go. It hit me. He might never really feel the way about me that I feel about him. He may never be able to trust me enough to let that happen. He notices too much. I could never live up to what he needs or wants.

I can't be Billy.

ME: Hey Jeremy?
JEREMY: Yeah?
ME: I'll meet you there, okay?
JEREMY: Okay. Why are you acting so solemn about it?
ME: Just...you never know.
JEREMY: Uh...guess not.

He laughed and walked away.

In my head, I said good-bye.