Nobody Walks Out on Me

Hi, my name is Jackson.

DAVIS: You're saying it's over?

I'm breaking up with Davis.

ME: Davis, I'm not even sure what 'it' was, exactly.

If you call this 'breaking up.'

I met him at his apartment for one of our little trysts, but as soon as we were done trysting I dropped the bomb that he had just gotten his last meal.

He was still laying in bed naked when I broke the news.

DAVIS: I don't believe this.
ME: It's not like you were in love with me or anything.
DAVIS: No, but--I mean--nobody's ever walked out on me.
ME: Didn't Joey?
DAVIS: Yeah, but he's never gotten over it.
ME: And didn't my brother choose Billy over you?
DAVIS: That was different. Your brother had to decide whether he wanted a relationship with me or not. What we have is purely sexual. I've never had anyone tell me they didn't want to have sex with me again.
ME: First time for everything I guess.

I leaned over and kissed him on the cheek.

ME: Don't take it personally. I get bored easily.
DAVIS: You're bored?
ME: It's been two weeks. Who wouldn't be bored?
DAVIS: But what about the banquet?
ME: I'll still be giving you your award. You're just going to have to find another date.
DAVIS: And what if I decide I'm not going? What if I decide I don't want to help you run RI-TRI anymore from behind the scenes?
ME: Then I'll tell Jeremy about our newly-ended situation.
DAVIS: Wait a second--

I explained things to him while I tied my tie.

ME: I don't need your help running RI-TRI anymore. I've got the gist of it. It isn't exactly the Red Cross, is it?
DAVIS: So you were just sleeping with me until you knew how to run things and then you were going to dump me like you just did because you knew I'd back down rather than have Jeremy find out? This was all part of some plan?
ME: Don't be silly. You're hot. You're well-known. You're a get.
DAVIS: I'm Davis.
ME: You're Davis. And I wanted to know I could get you. And I did. But now I'm done. The other stuff--Well, those were all just happy coincidences.
DAVIS: I don't believe in coincidences.

I finished buckling my belt.

ME: Then I guess I'm just a manipulative, little bitch, aren't I?

Davis jumped out of bed and pushed me up against the wall.

DAVIS: Tell me you don't want me to rip your clothes off right now and have my way with you again.
ME: Jesus, you sound like an episode of One Tree Hill.

I pushed him back and he landed back on his bed.

ME: I'll see you at the banquet. Don't forget. It's black tie.

As I was walking I out I felt a shoe go flying past my head.

Well, c'mon, it's not an exit unless someone's throwing something at you as you go.