The Vote

Hi, my name is Davis.

WILSON: So, what do you have to say?

I'm about to be executed.

After the Bart debacle, the RI-TRI committee went into damage control mode. Once word got out that an all-out fistfight had broken out during one of the meetings, I knew my dirt on the committee members wasn't going to be enough to keep them from tossing me out on my ass. They had to take action, which meant I was in the proverbial electric chair.

Joey had already given his vote in-absentia--he wanted me to stay. But it wasn't going to do much good.

JOEY: I'm sorry. I just can't be there to watch those guys attack you.
ME: It's fine. If Caesar could handle it, so can I.
JOEY: Caesar was brutally massacred.
ME: I was utilizing some selective memory, Joey.
JOEY: Oh, sorry.

That Roman bitch was lucky. He never had to deal with gay Rhode Island activists.

ME: I have nothing to say.
MARTY: You don't want to defend yourself?
ME: Against what, Marty? Your lime green polo?
WILSON: Davis--
ME: I'm sorry, but it's giving me a headache.
NICK: I say we vote.
ME: Did I mention that I f**ked your boyfriend last June, Nick?
NICK: You miserable bastard.
WILSON: We're voting. Your seat is about to become vacant, Davis.
ME: That's fine. You keep gaining weight and you're going to need an extra one, Wilson.
WILSON: All in favor of removing John Davis from--
VOICE: Wait!

Everyone turned around to see Jeremy walk into the boardroom. He walked in and took the seat next to Wilson--Bart's seat.

WILSON: I'm sorry, but this is a closed meeting.
JEREMY: Even for members?
NICK: You're not a member.
JEREMY: Before I say anything, I do want to make sure that I'm correct in thinking that it is possible for one member to cede his seat to someone else that he feels might be just as if not more capable than him or herself.
WILSON: What's your point?
JEREMY: I spoke with Bart an hour ago, and he gave his seat to me.

There was instant uproar. Even I was shocked. Why would Bart give his seat to my best friend?

JEREMY: I had him fax me a typed and signed document making everything official.
MARTY: But you don't know anything about this committee.
JEREMY: I know you're a bunch of catty, bitchy queens who are about to get rid of Davis just so you can save face in the community.
NICK: How dare you.
JEREMY: Nick, so good to see you. It's been awhile, hasn't it?
ME: Yes, the last time you saw him he was sucking off Tobey on our coffee table.
JEREMY: Good times.

More uproar. Despite the fact that I had no idea what was going on, I was thoroughly enjoying myself.

WILSON: Regardless of the fact that you may have deceptively gotten yourself a seat on this committee, that does not mean you'll be able to keep Davis here. All we need is a majority vote and he's gone.
JEREMY: I understand. I was wondering if I could have the floor for a moment before you make your decision.
WILSON: Fine by me.

Jeremy stood and addressed the firing squad.

JEREMY: John Davis is a complete asshole. I will be the first person to tell you that he's cocky, vain, predatory, vicious, pretentious, snobby, and more than likely, a sex addict.

God, with friends like these...

JEREMY: But he's also the best man I have ever known in my life, and that's because he's the only I've ever known who will admit to being all the things I just mentioned without making excuses as to why he is the way he is. When I was seventeen, I got myself a fake I.D. and I got into Prisms on a Friday night. I was so nervous, and not just because I was still wearing my school uniform underneath my jacket, but because I wasn't even sure I was gay yet, but here I was in this packed club trying not to look as terrified as I felt. And nobody came up to me to say hi. Nobody gave me a smile or introduced themselves. All I got were a bunch of quick looks to see if I was doable or not, and then a scowl when they realized I wasn't one-night stand material. But then this guy...

I remember that.

JEREMY: This guy...

Prisms, July 2001

ME: You get out of drama club practice late?
JEREMY: Excuse me?
ME: You're underage.
JEREMY: No, I'm not.
ME: Maybe just barely, but you are, in fact, underage.
JEREMY: Yeah, well...I won't be...in about a year.
ME: This isn't a good place to hang out if you don't have your balls in check.
JEREMY: What do you mean?

I looked over at a guy who was checking Jeremy out.

ME: Excuse me, are you a mime?
RANDOM GUY: Uh...
ME: A mute perhaps? Are you Marlee Matlin?
RANDOM GUY: I don't know who--
ME: If the answer to any of these questions is 'Uh...no,' then either come over and introduce yourself to the lovely underaged piece of jailbait or find someone else to gawk at.

The guy moved on pretty swiftly.

JEREMY: That was harsh.
ME: Look, this isn't some Youth Pride clubhouse. This is a gay bar. Walking in here is like walking into the prison yard. Only do it if you're prepared to make someone your bitch.
JEREMY: You're not going to make me your bitch, are you?
ME: No, but I might make you troll a few curbs.
JEREMY: Really?
ME: Yeah, you're not going to make it here.
JEREMY: That's your opinion.
ME: Ohhh, you're feisty. That might come in handy when you're fending off the meth bears.
JEREMY: You know what, I'm just going to leave. This isn't for me.

He started to walk away, and I could see that his life could go any number of ways at this moment, and most of them would be bad. So I called after him.

ME: How about I buy you some pancakes and you try this again in a year?

He stopped for a moment, and then turned around.

JEREMY: Deal.

And now, back to the present...

JEREMY: If it hadn't been for him looking out for me that night, I probably would be either in the closet or picking up discount gigolos or both. The foundation of my strength as a person comes from John Davis. Over the past six years of knowing him, I've seen him take in runaways, comfort kids whose parents have disowned them, kick the asses of several jerks who were picking on gay guys, run four Prides, sixteen benefits, and raise more money for charity than all the other people sitting in front of me combined. After awhile, I figured that I had to take the good with the bad. Now, the last time you all met with him you found out he was sleeping with another man's boyfriend--a man he proceeded to pummel in front of your eyes...
MARTY: And then carried the boyfriend out of here like Richard Gere in An Officer and A Gentleman.
JEREMY: Right, well...I guess you have to decide what I've already decided. If the good outweighs the bad. The reason I'm here today is because I think it's important to say that, not just as individuals, but as a community, we're all growing. We're all trying to figure out what it means to be a gay man in this country at this time. We have opportunities in front of us that nobody has ever had before, and there are going to be times when we buckle under those opportunities, when what is expected of us and what we're expected to rise above clashes and...and we screw up! Like Davis screwed up. And will probably screw up again. But we have to stop clawing at each other all the time, and holding each other down, or none of us are ever going to make it to that next level.

There wasn't a sound to be heard in the room.

JEREMY: Now vote.

When we got back to the apartment later that night, Jeremy just sat down on the couch and turned on the television. Extreme Home Make-over was on. That was normally my cue to disappear. He cries like a baby when he watches that show, and I'm not supposed to be around to see it. But I had something to say first.

ME: How long do you think you're going to stay on the committee?
JEREMY: I don't know. I kind of think it would be a good idea for me to try and make a difference.

Then I said something I rarely say.

ME: Thank you.
JEREMY: For what?
ME: For somehow getting a unanimous vote to keep me on RI-TRI.
JEREMY: I just spoke the truth.
ME: That's more than most people can do...including me.
JEREMY: I'm moving out next week. Think you could help me?
ME: Sure.
JEREMY: And no more asking me to stay?
ME: Fine. No more.
JEREMY: Thank you.

I started to go to my room, and then stopped.

ME: So, why'd you do it?
JEREMY: Because you would have done it for me.
ME: Yeah, but I'm not sure I could have convinced Bart to sign off on giving me his seat.
JEREMY: He didn't.
ME: What?
JEREMY: You really think I have any idea where Bart is? I forged the document.
ME: You're kidding.
JEREMY: Nope.
ME: What if Bart--
JEREMY: Bart's never coming back, and if he does...Well, you would have won the vote without me anyway, so it doesn't really make a difference, does it?
ME: I can't believe you did that.
JEREMY: Guess I have my balls in check, huh?

He looked back at me when he said that, and smiled.

I've trained that little bitch well.