Monday, February 20, 2012

Unnecessary Inquiries

Hi, my name is Nathan.

RICHARD: Someone's here to see you.

I was at the office I use for my "catering" company. We don't get a lot of unexpected business, mainly because we don't advertise or solicit customers in any way.

This being Rhode Island, however, people want anything that anyone has no interest in giving them, so believe it or not, we do quite well.

Not as well as our real business, however.

Not even close.

ME: Tell him I'm busy today. He'll have to get puffed pastry somewhere else.
VOICE: Actually, I've already eaten.

I looked up to see Paul, the hostage negotiator.

We didn't interact much during the Prisms incident, but I've seen a lot of him on television lately.

ME: Richard, why don't you take a break.
RICHARD: Sounds good.
ME: And close the door on your way out.
RICHARD: Always do.

I wasn't sure what sort of meeting this was going to be, but I was sure that whatever it was, it wasn't going to be something I'd want to lead anywhere outside of this office.

ME: So, how can I help you?
PAUL: I had some questions about what happened on the parking garage.
ME: Well then, you should talk to the police. They have the report.
PAUL: Actually--

He dumped a folder on my desk.

PAUL: --I have the report. I've been assigned the case.
ME: But you're a hostage negotiator.
PAUL: And an investigator. I just transferred to Providence. Clearing up the--
ME: Everything's clear. Bart's gone. End of story. Nice of you to drop by and check on me though.
PAUL: Actually, the case is still open.
ME: Why is that?
PAUL: We have no motive.
ME: He was insane. Isn't that motive enough?
PAUL: I meant for you.

Uh oh.

ME: Excuse me?
PAUL: Why did you feel compelled to take it upon yourself to shoot him?
ME: Take it upon myself? I was saving the lives of my friends.
PAUL: I didn't know you were so friendly with Jeremy and Jackson and--
ME: We have history.
PAUL: I'll say. I watched the CBQ show.

Oh great--a fan.

ME: Despite what differences you may have seen on the show, which, by the way, were mainly fictionalized by Jeremy, I still don't want to see anybody thrown off a roof by a madman.
PAUL: And do you always carry a gun on you.
ME: Catering is a dangerous business.
PAUL: Yes, but it's not the most dangerous--or the oldest, for that matter.

What the--

PAUL: Anyway, I just wanted to pop by. Funny thing though--a catering business with no kitchens in the office?

That's because we buy all our food from a gourmet restaurant outside Boston and import it to any Rhode Island affairs.

ME: We're all about the element of surprise.
PAUL: I bet you are. I look forward to us chatting again.

He smiled and left the office.

It looks like I have one more loose end to clear up.

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