Can I Fake Amnesia?

Hi, my name is Billy.

VOICE: I need to see my fiance!

This is not going to help the healing process.

EMMA: Billy, thank God!

I'd only been in the emergency room for half an hour before Emma burst in. I forgot that I listed her as a contact. Tom, her brother, was with her.

EMMA: What's going on?
TOM: The doctor said you got shot.
EMMA: Does his have anything to do with your friends from Jesus camp?
ME: Emma, I--
EMMA: Mom's back at the house just panicking over this. I didn't know what to tell her.
ME: You didn't let her turn on a tv, did you?
EMMA: No, why?

That's when the tv above the nurses' station cut away from its programming and the Breaking News logo flashed across the screen.

ME: Oh boy...
TOM: Is that the mall?
ANNOUNCER: Three hostages are being held at gunpoint on the roof of the mall parking garage. Earlier this evening, the Mayor along with several gay men were involved in an altercation at the gay nightclub Prisms downtown.

Gay gay gay...say it one more time, why don't you?

ANNOUNCER: One of the gay men shot was Billy--

Emma gasped. Tom just looked at the floor.

ANNOUNCER: --the inspiration for the hit blog-turned-book-turned-television show Catty Bitchy Queens.

That was when Tom looked up.

TOM: You're a CBQ?

I started to say something, but Emma slapped me.

EMMA: I am not speaking to you until our wedding!

Then, she stormed out of the room.

I was beginning to wish the bullet had gone into my face.