Sound Familiar?

Hi, my name is Davis.

JEREMY: You're the Mayor?

I'm the Mayor.

HANK: I see someone doesn't keep up on local politics.
ADAM: We live in New York now. Why would we care what happens here?
BEN: You and Jeremy live together?
JEREMY: No, Adam lives in the city. I live upstate.
ADAM: In a duplex.
ALL: Ew!

So that's where my former best friend has been hiding all these years.

JEREMY: Davis--
ME: Mayor--
JEREMY: Oh please! I don't care if you're the Emperor. What are you doing about the hostage situation?
NATHAN: What can he do? The guy hasn't even issued demands. I say we just bomb the place.
BEN: Nathan, Jackson's in there.
ADAM: Plus Paige.
HANK: Plus most of the gay community in the state.

This had the potential to be a political nightmare. It didn't help that the scum-sucking media was here.

RITCHIE: I'm reporting live from Prisms downtown.

It's even worse when you've slept with the scum-sucking media.

RITCHIE: Mr. Mayor, what's your response to the gunman's demands?
ME: He made demands?
RITCHIE: They're on his website.
ME: What are they?

Who needs police when you have an iPad?

RITCHIE: He says he'll trade everybody in the club for the following people. Joe Spencer, Josh Donaldson--
NATHAN: Who are those people?
JEREMY: Oh God...
ADAM: What is it?
JEREMY: None of you have read it, have you?
BEN: Read what?

Then it hit me.

Josh Donaldson.

ME: Those are the characters in your book.

Jeremy looked sick.

ME: The book you wrote about us.