Market Value

Hi, my name is Joey.

PATRICK: Can I ask a question?

I shouldn't be here.

PATRICK: Why is every guy at OSC lame?
ME: Um, that's sort of hard to...What?

Patrick asked me to get lunch with him. Adam hates Patrick, so I probably should have said "No," but I'm not good at thinking on my feet.

Plus, Patrick doesn't seem to be interested in me, so I figured it would be okay to hang out with him for a little while.

But then I got to thinking--

PATRICK: Like, why do you all have boyfriends?

--Why isn't he into me?

ME: Well, because we met people that we liked and--
PATRICK: But you're in college.
ME: Um, yeah.
PATRICK: You can be in million-year-long relationships for the rest of your life. College is supposed to be about having fun.
ME: I am having fun.

Patrick shot me a look. He sees right through me.

I love being with Adam, but being off the market is definitely a new feeling to get used to.

I don't go out anymore. I don't do anything wild and spontaneous.

I can actually tell you what happened on NCIS last week.

PATRICK: Look, you're cute and all, but this whole serious relationship thing makes you look old and old is not cute, so you're sort of not cute.
ME: But what about the whole forbidden fruit thing?
PATRICK: Yeah, but you're not really forbidden.
ME: Yeah, I am. I'm taken. That makes me forbidden.
PATRICK: Look, I don't want to work at having an affair or anything when I'm with a guy. I just want to have fun. Fun is what gives you a high market value.

Wow, things have changed.

Back when Billy and I were the prime real estate in the theater department being innocent and soft-spoken was the way to go.

Now you have to be fun?

ME: I can be fun!

Patrick smiled, leaned over, and whispered in my ear.

PATRICK: Prove it.

Yeah, I definitely shouldn't be here.