A Check You Can Cash

Hi, my name is Ritchie.

KATE:  There's someone here to see you.
ME:  Is it about the show we did on dalmatians?  Because I specifically said we couldn't prove that they give you cancer.
KATE:  It's your friend Nathan.

"Friend" is a strong word.

Nathan looked a little beat up.

ME:  I thought Ben was the convict.
NATHAN:  He hasn't been convicted of anything.
ME:  But it doesn't look good.  I'm doing a show with his lawyer on Friday.
NATHAN:  In other news, he'll be getting a new lawyer.
ME:  It's a media circus, Nathan.  Don't fight it.
NATHAN:  And just when will you be doing a show on the check you made out to Bart?

I knew he wasn't going to let this go.

ME:  Nathan, there wasn't anything behind that.
NATHAN:  So you always write checks to people you haven't seen over five years?
ME:  Bart was going to come on my show.  The check was an advance on an appearance fee.
NATHAN:  Why was he coming on the show?
ME:  That's confidential.
NATHAN:  Why?  Are you planning to dig him up for sweeps week?

If only I could...

ME:  He was going to talk about life in prison.  His sordid past.  He was even going to comment on Jeremy's book.
NATHAN:  That's it?  No big reveal?  No twist.
ME:  If I told you about it, it wouldn't be a twist now, would it?
NATHAN:  What are you saying?
ME:  I'm saying I may go public with what Bart was going to announce on the show.
NATHAN:  And does that have anything to do with Ben?
ME:  I guess you'll have to watch and find out.

Nathan closed the door to my office.

NATHAN:  Or you could show a little kindness.
ME:  Kindness begins under my desk, Nathan.
NATHAN:  You're disgusting.
ME:  What's the matter?  Afraid I might not be able to afford you?

I saw his face go pale.

ME:  Did I mention I don't have anyone for Monday's show yet?

Something tells me Nathan's price was going to be a lot lower than Bart's.