Out of Order

Hi, my name is Joey.

BART: I would like to have the newest member removed.
DAVIS: On what grounds?
BART: We used to date until recently when he broke my heart and made out with another man two feet away from our apartment door.

I am not prepared for this.

Bart hadn't spoken to me since the disastrous night of our break-up. I had a feeling seeing him at RI-TRI would not go over well.

Sure enough, he went for the kill.

ME: That's so unfair, Bart. He kissed me. I didn't kiss him. Plus, you brought him home for a fling and then kicked him out!

Carter had shared this little tidbit of information with me as Jeremy and I nursed him back to health after a blackout that could very easily have led to alcohol poisoning.

And now Bart's trying to get me pulled from the committee and humiliate me in front of everyone at RI-TRI?

Well...

ME: That's--

I wish I was better at confrontations.

ME: You're a mean person!

He might need to get a band-aid for that stinger.

Luckily Davis is better at this than I am.

DAVIS: First of all, Bart, I find it highly unprofessional that you would bring out all the pathetic details of your personal life--including getting minors drunk and bringing them home to your apartment in a truly morally turpitudous fashion--
BART: That's not even a word!
DAVIS: Silencio, por favor. I think you bringing all that out in this meeting is so--so--
ME: Lame!
DAVIS: Thank you, Joey. It's lame. Also, you can't have Joey removed just because he's not not sleeping with you anymore.
BART: But now he'll never vote with me due to our personal history.
ME: That's not true!
BART: So you're going to vote with me on the block party issue?
ME: No, actually. I disagree with you on that.
BART: Do you see?

This was getting out of hand.

ME: Bart, if you want to talk in private--
BART: Why bother? Everyone knows everyone else's business anyway! Our entire break-up was the headline in the Wilde Blog today!

WILDE: Guess whose on the market? A hot little piece called Joey. Get your haircuts, boys. This little number won't be sitting pretty for long. Oh wait, he might already be spoken for. Now, how does one get another beau immediately after losing the first one? Perhaps there was a bit of an overlap.

I can't stand Wilde. How did he find out about Davis and me?

BART: I can't believe I dated a cheater.
ME: Stop calling me that.
BART: Then admit it.
ME: I--
DAVIS: All right, enough.
BART: Who'd you cheat with, Joey?
DAVIS: I said enough.
BART: Who was it?
ME: Stop it, Bart.
BART: Who?
DAVIS: Bart, you're out of order.
BART: WHO? I ASKED YOU WHO?
ME: DAVIS! I'm sleeping with Davis!

There was a moment of shocked silence. Bart looked like I'd just shot him in the stomach. Davis just shook his head and did his little "God, I'm in for it now" smile. Then, he looked up at Bart and started to speak.

DAVIS: Bart, it's not--

But before he could say anything, Bart had jumped up on the table and run at him full force. He tackled him while he was still in his chair, and knocked him to the ground. Instantly, everyone was up and trying to pull Bart off Davis. Meanwhile, Bart had his hands on Davis' throat.

ME: Stop! Stop! You're going to kill him.

Or so I thought. One quick punch and Bart was on the floor next to Davis holding his nose which had already started bleeding.

Davis stood up, walked over to me, and kissed me in front of the rest of the committee who was just looking at us as if we were a cross between Adolf and Eva and Zach and Kelly.

Then he pulled back and said:

DAVIS: Let's get out of here. I want you naked on my kitchen table.

And I went, trying to ignore the fact that when I took Davis' hand I got some of Bart's blood on mine. But what I definitely couldn't ignore was the feeling that I was going to pay for all this later.